Day 0: RIF aftermath
Day 0
Today was my first day unemployed since I got my first restaurant job in college, around 2010. I was impacted by a RIF at the company that I was working for. I wasn’t good enough. I’m comfortable with that. I can control that. Now I’m on the hunt for a Staff Software Engineer job in a tough market. B R I N G I T.
I was blessed enough to have made it through several rounds of RIF events, always being on the other “employed” side of it. Anxiety about when the next RIF might happen wears on you over time—it makes you question whether today or tomorrow will be your last day. For me, it forced me to let go and let God. Thank the Lord that my identity isn’t my career, or else “I wasn’t good enough” would have been an anchor at the bottom of the ocean with my ego attached.
So here’s the thing: I’ve talked myself through what it would look like to lose my job during a RIF (you know, since there were many of them), usually the Monday after I found out who was gone and it had sunk in a bit. I’d say things like “I’d get a job delivering pizza immediately” or “I’d have 17 applications by midnight that day.” Truth is, I didn’t do either one of those. I prayed to God for humility and strength and I thanked Him for an amazing 5 years working on cool stuff. I thanked Him for the emergency fund that we built (shout-out to Dave Ramsey!) that will get us by for a few months at least. After I prayed, I got back to work and finished the way I started—curious, hungry for more work, and hoping to be a blessing as a team member and not a nuisance. The latter isn’t up to me to decide; the rest, I think, I nailed.
How did my actual Day 0 go?
Surreal
We just had a baby boy (Praise God!) who is struggling with lots of screaming fits—it’s safe to say that stress is at 1000% in the heat of the screaming. I don’t think folks realize it, but when moments of stress and overwhelm hit you, subconsciously you iterate through the things in your life that you can count on. You know, like a paycheck! When that’s not there as a backstop to your downturned mood, you sink a little. But GOD! My wife and I have already seen His hand in things that we’re excited about. We’re nervous, of course, but excited to see His plan unfold.
Focused
There isn’t any doubt in my mind about what has to happen. I need to pray and be in God’s Word often. I need to act my wage (which currently is $0.00, so I’m acting broke!). I need to work like I’m on call and own it all—40 hours a week is a luxury that I can’t afford right now. I need to love my wife, because her safety and stability were rattled. I need to be honest with my sons and show them what it looks like to fail and get back up. I need to be honest with my community because humility puts you in the best posture to witness God at work.
I focused on building an AI orchestration platform for home use. This enables me to work while I’m working. It also requires some forethought so that I don’t blow through AI credits. I also focused on building personal projects that I’ve written down in a note alongside all of my other “million-dollar ideas,” relishing the idea of actually having time to see them through. I focused on finding metrics for my productivity and impact so that I know when to pick up the Uber Eats phone and start delivering. I focused on applying for jobs, but not rushing or applying to “just anything”—at least, not yet.
Humbling
Our best friends came into town this weekend, unexpectedly coinciding with my first weekend of unemployment. They’ve blessed our socks off with food, laughs, and even a date night with my wife. We ate BOGO ice cream from Publix and watched YouTube in our minivan for an hour or so. It was awesome. What spoons, you ask? The ones we got from the soup area in Publix.
On this blog, I’ll be documenting my trials and errors while navigating the job market as a Staff Software Engineer, along with posts on other topics. My hope is that this blog encourages others, sheds light on the all-too-common RIF and its aftermath, and, most of all, sparks someone’s curiosity about God and His Son, Jesus Christ, who died for mankind.
To God be the glory. Amen!