Day 14: Pondering

Day 14

I started this blog fully expecting to have a solid amount of time to work on personal projects. This morning and throughout the day, I’ve realized that this has become more about my day-to-day and small accomplishments towards my “end-of-RIF” status. Perhaps that is valuable to some people? Other folks who have been through a RIF may enjoy seeing how others have tackled their own obstacles. I’ll be honest: most folks that I see who have been a part of a RIF “take some time” to find what is next. That would terrify me. Maybe I’m just a workaholic type, but I can’t stand the thought of being unemployed. It’s not a pride or ego thing; I’ve prayed on that. I’m the earner for our household. How can I raise Men to be providers when I’m not waking up every day and doing my absolute best to “kill it and drag it home”?

That’s how I’ve been taking this situation that my family and I are in. My job is finding a job, and it’s a full-time job at least. Forty hours a week is the minimum. I’m not saying that I haven’t taken my foot off the throttle on weekends or enjoyed some extra time during the day to hold my new baby boy. I am saying that I’ve treated this situation as dire.

What has been surprising is how busy I feel during the day. Finding potential jobs is time-consuming and, honestly, boring. Applications, when done right, take time to tailor to the role and to your abilities. When you can work on anything, you can get bogged down choosing what. Using Trello to organize my “to-dos” has helped me.

It has also surprised me that personal projects that I’ve wanted to dive in on haven’t felt like the priority. They’ve been my “palate cleansers” when I’m applying or training or learning or whatever else. I’m not sure how I feel about that yet, but it is what it is!

ChatGPT 5.6 Sol and I built an iOS app that is kinda fun. It addresses a personal problem that I have when I’m early to an event or meeting that I’ve driven to. The design came out stellar—like, seriously, it made me like the app before I used it. Most of it works with just a couple of prompts I gave it. I’ll be sharing it in the coming weeks and publishing it on the App Store, completing a long-term goal of mine: releasing a product.

RIF’ing hasn’t been what I expected; however, nothing has been an accident. I’ve prayed and let God lead; I’ve set my goals and worked towards them; I’ve prioritized; I’ve failed. Guess what, though? I’ve progressed.

Progress is just a few steps away.

Let go and Let God, reader! God Bless!